No one to kiss but a dog…

My start to 2019 began with the ball dropping on TV and me in bed with my two grand pups. Steve had fallen asleep on the couch and I was tired so went to bed alone. As the clock struck midnight, I hugged El (my little grand pup) and she licked my face. So yep… I kissed a dog to celebrate the entrance of a New Year!

(To save face, we did have friends over but we were all tired so they left at 10:45 pm and my husband did kiss me at 11:30 before he fell asleep on the couch. He had been up at 5:30 am since he worked that day. So that left me alone and smooching the dog!)

The new year is like getting a brand new journal. Fresh and clean and ready for a new story. I always love getting a new writing journal… it’s just waiting to be filled up with a story, thoughts, doodles or prayers. As we begin a new year, it is a time to look back and evaluate our past but also to look forward and plan and dream about a new, fresh start. It’s a time to make changes and resolutions. (And probably break some or all of those resolutions by February 1st.)

Recently I was in a Sunday School class and the teacher (shout out to Joe Kak) spoke about what you would like to resolve (promise to yourself or to God) for 2019. I made a list of some things that I would like to work on in this new year. I don’t want to call them resolutions necessarily because to me those are a bit cliche and easy to break. I also decided not to do the “normal” resolutions like going to the gym every day or no longer eating sugar (which I would like to do except for this little devil called ice cream.)

So for 2019… I resolve to work on…

1. Prayer. This is my #1 because I would like to be a person who says “I will be praying” and mean it. Saying “I will pray for you” has become trite… something we say when someone is struggling or sick or hurting. If I say it, I want you to know that I am truly praying. I want to become a woman who talks to God. All. The. Time.

2. Encouragement. I can tend to get self focused and busy in my own life. Don’t we all?! I think of people often but I want to work on taking it beyond a thought and reach out in action with a note, text, phone call, visit or a gift. Encourage means to inspire, hearten, embolden, fill with confidence… I want to be someone who fills others up.

3. Hospitality. I love people and miss having people in my home. One area I would to change is to let go of my loneliness since becoming an empty nester and invite more people into my home. Admittedly, I do not enjoy cooking but I can be hospitable with a take out pizza. Everyone likes pizza (except gluten and dairy free folks but I usually have lettuce and carrots in the fridge because let’s face it, the cookies get eaten quicker than the carrots). So I would like to fill my home back up with laughter and talking and fellowship.

(Btw… I was just joking and would offer more than lettuce & carrots to my gluten/dairy free friends. Thankfully there are many choices now for those with restrictions.)

Those are my three big ones… a few little ones are…

Sigh less. I drop a lot and therefore sigh a lot. With little balance and sitting in a wheelchair, retrieving things I have dropped is a struggle which leads me to loud and often overly dramatic sighing. I have already failed every day at this but awareness of said sighing has to be some sort of positivity, right? (Be an encourager and agree with me.)

Just today I failed at this as I tried to carry all of my groceries into the house at once and of course, several bags broke as I was going up the ramp and food went rolling everywhere and I could not reach half of it and the other half blocked my entrance into the house. This ended with not only a sigh but me yelling out loud and outside for all the neighbors to hear… “SERIOUSLY!!!“

Look for the positive. Searching for the positive in a world of constant negatives is a habit I want to develop. I want to look for the positive both in people and in situations. Searching for the positive amidst annoying people or during aggravating situations is a goal for 2019.

Living life as a paraplegic creates constant frustrating situations. It also gives you an opportunity to see some very rude people like the woman who recently took the last handicapped parking space, hopped out of her car in high heels, and strutted into Target… can I please have her disability instead? I guess they now give placards for the chronic illness of ignorance.

So I am going to strive to look for the positive. For example… those annoyances give me fodder for my blog.

Establish better habits. Honestly my sleep schedule is out of whack, my diet is irregular and not balanced, my motivation level is low, my house needs organization and I spend too much time on my phone. Oh yeah… and that financial side of life is another area to work on. These are the resolutions that most people break by the end of January. So instead of resolutions, I just want to adjust, be more aware, more disciplined and more intentional in developing some better habits. (Crap… it’s currently 1:13 am so the sleep schedule is still a work in progress too.)

These are a few thing I personally would like to work on for 2019. I know like most resolutions, I will have good and bad days. Some moments I will succeed and some moments I will fail. As I look back at these first days of January, I realize I haven’t succeeded in any of these areas but thankfully tomorrow is a new day and His mercies are fresh every morning! (Lamentations 3:23)

And as the saying goes, I would rather try and fail than fail to try.

What would you like to resolve this year?